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considering eating..  
11:27am 23/08/2010
I'm considering maybe eating today. today will be day 9 of fasting. my body and brain function absolutely suck, and I just feel like I'm constantly going to pass out. Walking to class is almost more than I can take right now.

I'm just scared that if I do eat a little something, I'll remember the taste of food, and it will be like my dream.. I'll eat everything in sight. I am so torn and so scared it's almost bringing me to tears. But that's probably just my emotions going crazy from not eating. I'm so constantly upset and pissed off. I hate it. I'm usually so bubbly and happy.

I need a nap desperately bad.

but I have to go back onto campus in about 20 minutes, then I have class until 3:15. then I have a chiropractor appointment at 4. damn chiropractor.. getting in the way of my plans! I have have have to take a nap before I go work out tonight. or I surely will pass out on the elliptical.

off to learn more random crap :)
hope yall are having wonderful days
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(no subject)
06:49pm 23/08/2010 (UTC)
i totally understand , how youre afraid to eat. i always feel like ill spiral out of control, because a few times i did. we're so afraid of failure it hurts.
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(no subject)
09:35pm 23/08/2010 (UTC)
Do you ever have that daydream where you have one day to eat whatever you want absent negative repercussions? I'd head for the strawberry yogurt straightaway, and then perhaps some apples...
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